Thursday, May 22, 2008

From the comment box. Thanks Louise.

Tonight I want to post a bit more as a follow up to my previous post:

Do you ever feel like you want to give up?

Louise from Purcell's Chicken Voluntary made an excellent comment that made me think quite a bit today. I have realized many things from Louise's post so just wanted to comment on it and respond to it a bit here.

Louise's comments are in bold italics.

Maybe organising some time with their friends after school and on weekends might help on that score.

this would be good and I have approached a couple of mothers. Life just seems to get in the way of this. Hopefully it will happen sometime.


I opt for a very relaxed way of homeschooling myself and I know for a fact that a more rigidly structured style really burns me out - I have tries it.

You are probably like me (if you're a SHE!) and you may personally prefer flexibility over routine.

Yes. I am definitely a she. I do tend towards too much flexibility though.

Perhaps you could (just a suggestion here) spend a week or two doing just your Flylady morning and evening routines and perhaps the 15 minute declutter/ or Kelly Mission. Oh, and there is the laundry I suppose! But you could do that in 15 minute lots if you wanted and the kids could help (if they don't already).

You could, after your morning routine, gather the kids for a bit of prayer time (not too much - whatever you're comfortable with - baby steps!) and then set the timer for 15 mins maths, 15 mins English, either all the kids or just one at a time and alternate with some activities that *you* really enjoy! Why not set the timer for 15 minutes and say, "okay kids, have fun for 15 minutes and keep an eye on Christopher, while I do X."

You are obviously a beautiful, creative soul (and a SHE!) so work *with* that, not against it.

These are some great suggestions Louise. Thanks. I realized today that I do tend to work against being a she in several ways.

I don't know about you, Therese, but having a whole day of routine, day after day, makes me want to jump off a bridge. Really.

I think with me, this happens if we are doing the same thing every day. So when I plan routines, I plan a week ahead and try to vary the days.

Last term I had my morning routine, my home school timetable and an evening routine. Most days between 3 and 5.30 were unstructured except for running children to after school activities. It is definitely something I need. A time that I can sit and do nothing if I choose too.

Unfortunately, when it comes to homeschooling, we often expect ourselves (and others expect us) to be "structured" because we think this equals "organised." But it is possible to be organised, yet not very structured. Getting the balance right between all strucute, and no structure is probably a life-long journey for homeschooling SHEs! I often "tweak" what we do and how we're doing it.

I think what I worry about is the children will not be getting educated if we don't do abc in a certain order everyday. I think I worry about them falling behind other children their age and not really learning academically.

I am really aware that last term because I set a routine for the mornings that was the same day in day out they learnt really quickly that this was the way it was going to be and just got on and did it without arguing with me about it (after the first two to three weeks). I am finding myself fighting them more this term and they are doing less. I know I need to be firmer and deal out consequences for bad behaviour. I think it isn't the fact that we are home schooling that makes me want to give up, it is the fact that I haven't been firm enough with the children in setting the expectation.

Sorry this has been a long comment and feel free to ignore everything I've written, as it is mostly just my own experience coming through.

Thank you for your comment. It really made me think through what the real issue was.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

You're welcome, Therese. Just getting to the crux of the problem is the main thing for any of us, isn't it?

I do know exactly how you feel about the worry of the children possibly not getting educated. I think all homeschooling parents have that worry, because the buck really does stop with us. You're not alone there. And then parents with kids at school still have plenty of stuff to worry about! (It's in the nature of a parent to worry at least somewhat, I think).

If you get a chance, you could email Cathy S in Adelaide with some of your concerns - she is fantastic to "talk" to!

Alexandra said...

"I need to be firmer and deal out consequences for bad behaviour...I need to be firmer...not firm enough with the children in setting the expectation."

I bet this is the crux since everything else is the way you like it. After you mentioned that structure works for you, I was thinking that maybe the tweaking needed to go the other way.

When I stress, I need less structure...maybe you balance comes with more.

Please pray for a cure for Type One Diabetes

Please pray for a cure for Type One Diabetes
Our sons Tom and Christopher and our daughter Amelia are type one diabetics. We pray everyday for a cure. We do not want one by illicit means though so don't support any organisation that contributes to Embryonic Stem Cell Research. Click on the photo of Tom and Christopher to read about why I am against using Embryonic Stem cells for a cure.

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